Tasleem Ahmad Fateh

My featured section has the solution to all your LinkedIn woes! | Founder at LinkedIn Creator's Club | Your favourite creators are already in. Are you?

I'm the LinkedIn Coach your parents warned you about.

Founder

Hosting a Community of Creator's where we uncover the latest and greatest in personal branding strategies! With a vision to uncover the best ways to establish your authority online and monetise your personal brand!

Congratulations LinkedIn Purity Police 👏 
YOU’VE DONE IT!

Nobody sounds like AI anymore.
Now we all sound like assholes instead.

Because apparently the new LinkedIn sport is “spot the  AI copy”:

“That’s an em dash. AI.”
“That’s a listicle. AI.”
“That sentence flowed too well. AI.”

Bro…

Sometimes a good writer is just a good writer.

You’re not morally superior because you didn’t use ChatGPT.

It doesn’t make you Stephen King.
It doesn’t even make you Budget King.

Here’s what actually matters in writing:

Make people feel something.
Make them think something.
Make them do something.

(Yeah I just used the rule of three, suck it.)

Good writing isn’t “human” or “AI.”

Good writing is whatever lands.

Judge the post by the impact.

Not by whether it includes an em dash.

OK?

Posting on LinkedIn is already hard as it is. 

So what if Tom used a little tool? 

Don't pick on Tom. 

Anyway…

I’m about to use an em dash AND a listicle in my next post.

Arrest me.

K thanks bye.

I supply words to the rich and busy. Part Owner of the “MEME team” and responsible for bringing fun back to LinkedIn, one meme at a time.

I've done UNSPEAKABLE THINGS for clients...

For example:

None of this was in the contract, but I did it anyway:

1) Find them a boyfriend. (It didn't work)
2) Fire people on their behalf.
3) Counsel them through a divorce.
4) Help them move money overseas (50k)
5) Pick their outfit for a keynote (yes, seriously)
6) Plan their wedding.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve done for a client…

or had a client ask you to do?

I need to know I’m not alone 😅

Also tell me.

Did I do the right thing or should I have stuck by the agreement only? 

(No wrong answers, I'm genuinely curious)

Aidan Brannigan

Digital Content

I create content viewed 300M times/year, driving 7 figures in revenue, but my parents still think I'm unemployed.

I’m the Founder of No Boring Brands, the content agency behind the highest performing brands on socials.

We're generating 100s of millions of organic views for our clients. 

Also...

- I built the largest marketing meme page on IG in less than 2 years
- I lost $500k in crypto when I was 20 
- I've been featured in WSJ and AdAge
- I lost a spam eating contest to Joey Chestnut in front of 14,000 people 
- I've run meme campaigns for a $100B+ company
- I spoke at SXSW about memes
- I'm currently trying to gaslight myself onto Under Armour's board of advisors
- I own a network of work meme pages on IG with a following of 130,000 doing 15,000,000 views/month

Creator

I do a bunch of fun stuff

I let my intrusive thoughts win.

I had this dude DM THREE times with the exact same intro, talking about how he's a Serial Entrepreneur.

So I had to respond the only way my brain would allow me.

For content like this for your brand, noboringbrands.co

I Sell Funny Content | Founder & CEO @ No Boring Brands | The Agency Behind the Most Entertaining SaaS Brands

I Sell Funny Content | Founder & CEO @ No Boring Brands | The Agency Behind the Highest Performing Brands on Social

Brand: we love your content, it’s hilarious

Me: thanks haha

Brand: we want to hire your agency to make a video for us to go viral, because we don’t know how to go viral 

Me: okay, it’s this much

Brand: great

Me: great, here’s the video 

Brand: we don’t like the video

Me: why?

Brand: it won’t go viral

Me: so why’d you hire us?

Brand: to help us go viral

Me: okay so let’s use that video

Brand: no it won’t work

Me:

Is it?

If it isn't, I feel like it should be

Noboringbrands.co

Never been ratioed this hard in my life 😭

You try to do something nice and it just blows up in your face

noboringbrands.co

I Make Memes for a Living | Founder & CEO @ No Boring Brands | The Agency Behind the Highest Performing Brands on Social

me: haha no im not burnt out whatsoever

also me:

Noboringbrands.co

It really is insane if you think about it.

Noboringbrands.co

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I used to charge $25 an hour.

Twenty.
Five.
Dollars.

For advice that was objectively valuable.

I didn’t know my worth back then.

I was operating from fear.
 
People booked me constantly.

Which, in hindsight, was a red flag.

Then I did the inner work.

I realized that high-level thinkers don’t trade time for money.
 
They trade energy.
 
So I raised my rates.

$25/hour → $1,250/hour.

A necessary pivot.

And sure, people stopped booking.

But that wasn’t rejection.

That was filtration.

The wrong people fell away.
 
The aligned people simply haven’t arrived yet.

And honestly?

I’d rather have:

- Zero clients
- Perfect positioning
- And a fully open calendar, making $0

Than be booked back-to-back meetings making $25/hr. 

Few understand this.

The dreaded ice breakers in corporate.

Ya know, the “share a fun fact about yourself.”

This fella took the fun fact sharing to the next level.

My sister just got an internship at a large consulting firm.

She told me the hourly rate they’re paying her.

This was my reaction.

Noboringbrands.co

graphical user interface, text, application, chat or text message

I absolutely love when I see my friends, family, and peers 

And they say, “I love that thing you posted earlier this week”

Hahah yeah me too.

Which one though? 

I’ve posted 184 times this week.

I was in Brickell last week.

I rented a Ford Expedition for the week.

I went to park the Ford Expedition at the hotel.

The guy at valet said it was too big to park.

He recommended I go park at the garage across the street.

I drove to the garage across the street.

The height clearance was 6'2 (I'm 6'2 btw).

If you've ever seen a Ford Expedition, you know it will not fit in a garage with a height clearance of 6'2.

So I left the parking garage.

I circled my hotel and found a public parking lot right under the highway and across the street from the hotel.

I parked the Expedition there.

As I'm sitting in the car getting my phone, wallet, and keys, a homeless dude walks up to the car.

I try to wave him off.

But he insists so I roll my window down. 

He says, "There's tons of glass on the ground. Two cars were broken into last night. Don't you see that?"

I didn't say anything. I saw the glass.

He said, "I wouldn't park here if I were you."

I thanked him for the heads up, but honestly I didn't want to have to find another spot.

So I pulled out a $20, handed it to him.

He then proceeded to tell me he sleeps over there in the corner of the parking lot and that he'd watch my car and "beat the f*ck out of anybody who tries to mess with it."

The dudes name was JJ.

I came out to the parking lot the next morning and my car was untouched.

So I paid a homeless dude $20 to watch my car overnight. Is that not the coolest form of delegation or what. 

Had to share that story and show some love to JJ.

Best personalized notes to send on LinkedIn:

(Number 3 is genius)

1) I’d like to add you to my professional network.
2) I have legit no idea who you are.
3) You seem unimportant.
4) You seem like you could use the connection.

What are your go-to personalized notes?

#thoughtleadership

Here’s a free viral idea:

(You’re welcome in advance)

If you’re a startup who raised a seed round, you should announce the seed with a maternity-like photo shoot of your founders with one another.

Your founders holding hands, frolicking through a field of daisies. Your founders leaning up against an oak tree, with one of their hands around the other's stomach.

This would likely go triple platinum.

“Guess”

For memes like this for your brand, visit Noboringbrands.co

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The Battle

Tasleem Ahmad Fateh

Aidan Brannigan

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taplio

The Battle

Tasleem Ahmad Fateh

Aidan Brannigan

Followers

Posts

Engagements

Likes

Performance Score.css-goub6s{font-size:var(--chakra-fontSizes-md);font-weight:500;color:var(--chakra-colors-gray-600);display:block;margin-top:var(--chakra-space-1);}Tasleem Ahmad Fateh's LinkedIn Performance

Performance ScoreAidan Brannigan's LinkedIn Performance

Ready to grow your LinkedIn presence?

Performance ScoreTasleem Ahmad Fateh's LinkedIn Performance