Non-wanky SEO and SEO Content. They say you can't know Technical SEO AND copywriting - I can. And do.

You're probably only here to see what type of person uses the word 'wanky' in a business profile, and that's OK.

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I help B2B business owners get found on Google with non-wanky SEO. Because there's a lot of wanky SEO advice out there. I explain it in proper English, I don't promise miracles, and I won't try to sell you a course on optimising for traffic sources that account for less than 1% of your visitors.

If you're fed up with SEO advice that makes your brain hurt, I've spent 30 years learning what works and what's complete bollocks. While everyone else is losing their minds over AI search or "GEO" , I'm over here focusing on the stuff that brings in actual traffic and actual enquiries..

WHAT I OFFER:

♦️On-page and technical SEO for businesses that need to show up in Google searches that matter. From £750

♦️SEO copywriting for websites and blogs. The kind that brings in leads, not just people who click away after three seconds. From £450

♦️The Non-Wanky SEO Course (£750, payment schedules available) if you want to learn this stuff properly without someone talking at you like you're five.

♦️The Non-Wanky On-Page SEO Toolkit (£200, payment schedules available) for the quick wins you can sort out yourself.

♦️The SEO Fucking What? Newsletter - weekly -  and Podcast, where I spend 15 minutes a week ranting about whatever's currently annoying me in the SEO world (and telling you what to do instead). Free.

WHAT I WON'T DO:

♦️Promise you'll be ranking number one by next Tuesday.

♦️Charge you hundreds for tactics I could explain in ten minutes.

♦️Talk in jargon when normal words exist.

♦️Take your money if I don't think I can help.

My mornings start with SE Ranking and Google Search Console, because guessing is for people who like wasting money, and data is where the insights come from.

I've been doing this since before SEO was even called SEO, and I can tell you what drives traffic versus what gets sold in flashy courses that cost £3000.

Whether you need someone to sort out your SEO, want to learn it yourself, or just need to know why Google's ignoring your website, drop me a message.

Fair warning: if you don't need my help, I'll tell you that too.

Nikki Pilkington

I'm just gonna leave this here...


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Image description: post on r/analytics on Reddit saying: 

"We just found out our AI has been making up analytics data for 3 months and I'm gonna throw up.

So we've been using an AI agent since November to answer leadership questions about metrics. It seemed amazing at first fast answers, detailed explanations, everyone loved it.

I just found out it's been hallucinating numbers this entire time.

Our VP of sales made territory decisions based on data that didn't exist. Our CFO showed the board a deck with fake insights. The AI was just inventing plausible sounding percentages.
I only caught it by accident when someone asked me to double check something. I started digging, and holy shit, it's bad."

non-wanky SEO. Yes, non-wanky. Yes, I know - it’s OK if I’m not for you. Thanks.

I mean, I'm very much of the mind that we don't all have to agree all of the time, but in this case, I very much agree with this post and the comments that come afterwards. 

😂

The Website Chef | A WordPress website designer with the recipe for success

I was alerted to the genius that is Nikki Pilkington by a colleague last year. Nikki has a refreshingly irreverent approach to SEO. I’ve been reading her posts and listening to her podcasts and even though they are sometimes sweary, she always gives nuggets of wisdom. When Nikki shares her expertise it is well worth paying attention. She has de-mystified much around SEO and I have learned so much that I can apply to projects for my clients. 

I highly recommend you check her out on LinkedIn and follow her if she’s a good fit. You will be entertained. You will learn a lot. You will finally understand SEO in everyday language.

Lorna Smart Wordcrafter

•Poetry and articles published online and in print
• Edited and wrote for the 3rd edition of Computers in Amateur Radio, a book published by the RSGB (Radio Society of Great Britain)
• Proofread two steampunk novels
• Proofread and edited a local history book
• Proofread and edited a life coach website
• Writes blog posts for Kelp Social
• Proofread The Everyday Change Playbook by Susie Palmer-Trew and the updated version.
• Proofread How to Build a World-Class Business One Brick at a Time by Sandy Domingos-Shipley
• Edited The Antenna Notebook, a book published by RSGB (Radio Society of Great Britain).

Freelance Writer

Norwich City Council

• Answer the telephone. I worked on the repairs, tenancy and general line. 
• Log repairs, send messages to the relevant people and  use notes to answer queries. 
• Investigate issues such as missed appointments, delayed works and rent issues.

Customer Contact Advisor 

The Shoebox Community Hub

• Identifying, planing and creating opportunities to have conversations with local residents
    • Recording the conversations and key points 
    • Building relationships locally to promote and create opportunities for  conversations
    • Conduct conversations in a range of settings to reach a diverse range of local residents

Community Connector

Norwich Practices Health Centre

• Answering messages from patients that come through the website's contact page
• Sending text messages out to patients via SystmOne

Administrator

Robinsons Motor Group

• Answering inbound calls
• Distributing calls to the relevant departments or people 
• Taking and sending messages where the departments or people are not available
• Resolving queries when I am able to

Call Center Operator

Open Contact

• Answering inbound sales and customer service calls
 • Processing sales orders
 • Processing and resolving customer service issues

Inbound Call Handler 

QD COMMERCIAL GROUP HOLDINGS LIMITED

•   Successfully proof read information provided by suppliers which required a very good eye for detail 
    •   Responsible for editing information into a suitable website format and completing copywriting
    •   Accurately input data onto spreadsheets whilst utilising formulas and bespoke software
    •   Applied excellent time management and organisational skills to the benefit of the business

Content Coordinator

Connells Group

•   Monitored system data for potential HMOs, checking if a licence was required or not
    •   Liaised with councils and branches to ensure new schemes were implemented
    •   Entrusted to notify landlords relating to new schemes or changes in legislation
    •   Responsible for sweeping the system, checking for missing or incorrectly imputed EPCs
    •   Utilised a methodical skill set, ensuring the assessment of information in a detailed manner
    •   Successfully applied analytical, document management and problem solving abilities

Project Coordinator

Sequence (UK) Ltd

•   Delivered excellent customer service whilst answering the phone and dealing with queries and issues		
    •   Maintained a property portfolio whilst also liaising with tenants, landlords, local branches and contractors
    •   Ensured gas safety certificates were up to date and property inspections were completed
    •   Accurately processed tenant and landlord notices, whilst also dealing with vacant property portfolios

Property Coordinator

Aviva

This was a full time, temporary position.

Invoice Processor

Are errors in your manuscript popping up and mocking you every time you proofread it?

Does each round of editing your manuscript result in very little being removed or changed?

Are you finding it hard to be objective about your manuscript?.

Are your social media posts getting swallowed up by the prowess of more established companies?

Is the English language tripping you up?

Do you struggle with getting your copy and content ideas from your head onto the page?

If the answer to any of these is yes, I’m the person you need.

I will return your manuscript to you as error free as possible so your story will shine in its full glory.

I am the pair of eyes that will give you an objective insight into your work to help you see what should stay and what should go.

I will release your trapped ideas and transform them into words that will draw your audience in.

I will polish your content and copy so that you’re potential clients will see clearly why they should become your client.

I am particularly interested in working with individuals, small businesses, freelancers, social enterprises and charities.

You will not find a price list here as my prices depend on the nature of the project and the level of work involved. I do this to ensure that you have the full cost upfront.

taplio

The Battle

Nikki Pilkington

Lorna Smart Wordcrafter

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Performance ScoreNikki Pilkington's LinkedIn Performance

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taplio

The Battle

Nikki Pilkington

Lorna Smart Wordcrafter

Followers

Posts

Engagements

Likes

Performance Score.css-goub6s{font-size:var(--chakra-fontSizes-md);font-weight:500;color:var(--chakra-colors-gray-600);display:block;margin-top:var(--chakra-space-1);}Nikki Pilkington's LinkedIn Performance

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Performance ScoreNikki Pilkington's LinkedIn Performance