💪Girl dad 🛋️Psychologist 🌅I pulled back from a prestigious (but overworked) clinical path to design a 6-figure career around my family 🤝🏾I help therapists build and make money from their online courses and podcasts

I didn’t grow up around business owners.
To be honest, I thought I’d do therapy and testing forever.

Then, in 2014, a snowstorm shut everything down. 

The power went out.
The roads froze.

I canceled 21 therapy sessions in one week.

We were saving for our first home.
And just like that, my income was gone.

So I started asking better questions.

A few months later, in March 2015, I launched a small podcast called Selling The Couch. 

No hype. Just showing up each week (and recording from a TV dinner stand from Walmart!).

Over time, it became:

• 🌍 A top 0.5% podcast worldwide
• 📊 1.92M+ downloads in 100+ countries
• 💛 A trusted space for thoughtful builders

Then life changed again.

Our daughter was born 7.5  weeks early.
The sounds of the NICU stayed with me as she struggled to make it.

That season taught me this:

How you build matters as much as what you build.

⸻

Today, I help thoughtful professionals grow without burning out.

So far:
• 🎧 245+ therapists launched podcasts
• 🧠 50+ founders built online courses
• 💰 $1M+ earned—while building around family and health

My own business is built around:

🥾 Hiking
🧩 Deep work
⛪ Church
⛳ Golf
💬 Time with the people I love

Because success that breaks your nervous system
isn’t success.

⸻

In fall 2025, I started learning to play golf. ⛳
I was 43.

It was a dream I’d had since I was eight.

I'm committed to weekly lessons with a PGA coach, hours of practice, and more hip mobility training that I know what to do with. 😅

Golf teaches me patience, pressure, and staying calm when it matters.

⸻

What I’m focused on now

Haven — a calm community for therapists building:
• 🎙️ Podcasts
• 📘 Courses
• 🎥 YouTube
• 🎤 Speaking + writing

No hustle culture.
Just steady progress.

👉 sellingthecouch.com/haven

I also write The Quiet Builder ✍️
A paid newsletter for people who want to build their careers around their lives and health.

⸻

Starting in Fall 2026, I'm working privately with people who make
high-stakes decisions under pressure—

where lives, capital, or influence
are on the line.

🩺 Doctors, Lawyers, and Surgeons
📈 Investors
🏗️ Founders
🏌️ Elite performers

The work is about one thing:

🧘 Identifying your unique performance blocks + staying calm when mistakes are costly.

⸻

If you’re building something meaningful and want to stay whole while doing it—let’s connect =).

Melvin Varghese, PhD

Burnout doesn’t start with exhaustion.

It starts when we ignore the early signals.
👀 Skipping meals
📱 Scrolling too much
😮💨 Feeling distant from work you used to love

In today’s episode of Selling the Couch, I’m joined by clinical psychologist,  author, and my friend, Dr. Emily Anhalt, whose work on emotional fitness is helping therapists, founders, and helpers build resilience—without self-sacrifice.

We talk about:

✅ Emotional fitness vs emotional intelligence
✅ How to know when burnout is around the corner
✅ A powerful “emotional push-up” you can try today
✅ Why boundaries are blueprints for sustainability—not barriers

This conversation is honest, practical, and such a refreshing reframe for anyone in the helping professions who’s tired of white-knuckling their way through it all. 🙂 

🎧 Listen here: https://lnkd.in/ezzpAn2w

📘 Get Emily’s book Flex Your Feelings: dremilyanhalt.com

Let me know what lands for you—and feel free to share this with a therapist or leader who might need it. We all need a little more emotional fitness in our lives.

Melvin Varghese PhD

💪 Girl dad + Psychologist + New Golfer ⛳ Helping therapists & quiet builders grow calm, strong businesses ✍🏽 Sharing slow growth lessons since 2015

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I used to think the goal was to be everywhere.
Instagram. Facebook. LinkedIn. 

Always posting. Always showing up.

And for a while, it worked.

My Facebook group grew to nearly 10,000 therapists.
I had a few posts go viral on Twitter (180k+ views). 

LinkedIn brought in opportunities I couldn’t have imagined.

From the outside, it looked like momentum.

But something else was happening underneath. 😔

I stopped measuring the depth of my work.
And started measuring how many likes it got.

I started measuring how I felt on the inside by how my posts were doing.

A few years ago, I shut down that Facebook group + stopped posting on Twitter.

And lately, I’ve been pulling back here on LinkedIn, too.

Not because I hate social media.

But because I'm starting to tune in to how my nervous system feels when I'm always on social (not great).

I'm also (very slowly) realizing that I do much better with 1 on 1, small group chats, and actually meeting up with people.

It's a big reason why this year I'm focusing a lot more on in person meetups + phone calls.

Recently, I recorded a Quiet Builder episode on this idea of "growing without always being on social media."

https://lnkd.in/eViuDyiM

Would LOVE to hear how you're thinking about this. 🙂

I sat down this morning to write a post about our latest Quiet Builder episode...but I can’t finish it without acknowledging what’s been happening in Minnesota.

In just the past few weeks, federal immigration agents have shot and killed at least two U.S. citizens in Minneapolis, including a 37‑year‑old ICU nurse who was described by family and friends as someone who cared deeply about helping others. 

This isn’t just news on a screen.

It’s real people.
Real grief.
Real fear.

And truthfully... it’s left me reeling.

⸻

As someone who has lived in this country as an immigrant, who wants to show up for others, and who believes in service and community, I find myself struggling with two things at once:

1️⃣ 𝗠𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗰𝘁‑𝗮𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗱𝗮𝗻𝘁

When events like this happen, there’s a part of me that just wants to turn away — to protect my peace, to focus on work, to stay safe.

2️⃣ 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝘂𝘀𝗵 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗜 𝗰𝗮𝗻’𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆

Because part of building platforms like this — slow, deep, relational platforms — is exactly to be a voice for people who don’t feel heard.

⸻

My heart breaks for my country right now.
It breaks for Minneapolis.

It breaks for those who are scared, uncertain, and hurting.

And it breaks for the therapists and clinicians I know — the ones who will hold other people’s pain and their own.

This is heavy work.
Emotionally. Humanly. Spiritually.

If you, too, are having a hard time with what’s unfolding — in Minnesota or anywhere suffering violence and fear — you’re not alone.

It matters that we care.

It matters that we feel.

It matters that we don’t look away.

Today was a big day in my golf journey. 🙂

After a few weeks of lessons…practice....
a lot of slow-motion swings in the lab (and lots of "what the heck am I doing learning this game at 43?" moments)…

I finally made it out to the range. 🏌🏾‍♂️

I have no idea if what I’m doing is “good” —
But it felt great to see the ball fly.
Even if it wasn’t always straight. 😅

Feels like Day 1 all over again.
And I’m here for it.

Any fellow golfers here?
Would love to connect . 🙂

26 days after I launched my podcast, it ranked higher than Snoop Dogg’s new podcast. 😅

It’s funny to look back on now.
But at the time, it meant 𝙖 𝙡𝙤𝙩.
I needed it to mean a lot.

In my 20s and 30s, I tied my worth to success.
If I wasn’t achieving, I felt like I was failing.
That feeling ran deep.

Over the years, therapy, brainspotting, and my faith helped me see something else:
𝗜 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗜’𝗺 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴.

That’s been hard to accept.
But also freeing.

Now in my 40s, I’m making some changes.

Starting in 2026:

• I’ll work just 2 days a week on Selling the Couch
• I’ll spend 1 day playing golf and another day practicing
• And I’ll spend another day in a new experience called A Quiet Approach

It’s for people who need to stay calm under pressure—
like surgeons, investors, and founders.

We’ll use golf as a playground to see how stress shows up and brainspotting to help reset the nervous system.

But here’s the big question I’ve been sitting with lately:

𝗖𝗮𝗻 𝗮 𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗯𝗲 𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲 “𝘀𝘂𝗰𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗳𝘂𝗹?”

I think the answer is yes.
But it’s a shift I’m still learning to live.

I made a short video about this if you want to watch. 🙂
📽️ https://lnkd.in/eXEuWQy2

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⛳ Any fellow golfers out there?! Let's connect. 🙂

Open Question

❓ Would love to hear...how are you navigating chasing vs being content with enough?

Last week, we launched something new.
It’s called 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯.

A calm, steady space for therapists building online courses, podcasts, YouTube channels, speaking, and writing—without the whole hustle vibe.

We kicked things off with a live accelerator on:
𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗔𝗜-𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲.

15 thoughtful colleagues joined me.
We’re exploring what it means to build a course that lasts—
even in a world where AI changes everything.

I’ll be honest...
Every time I launch something new, I still feel it.

That quiet voice:
“Will this work?”
“Will it help?”
“Will anyone say yes?”

But they did.
And I’m so grateful. 😭

We’re keeping this first cohort small—
not to create hype or scarcity,
but to serve deeply.

To listen.
To build something that actually supports.

Next up?
A short pause,
then our 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲 𝗙𝗹𝘆𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗲𝗹 accelerator in April—
how to use AI + quiet strategy to turn one video into many.

The part means a lot to me?

We’ve set aside 10% of every sale from Haven
to create a scholarship fund for girls and women rescued from brothels in the commercial sex trade.

To support their education.
To help rebuild lives that deserve more than survival.

This is something our family has wanted to do for a long time.

Now, with Haven’s potential to scale, it finally makes sense to start.

Because this isn’t just about business.

It’s about asking:
What does generational impact actually look like?
And how do we quietly build toward it?

💬 If you’re a therapist building something meaningful online,
DM me and I’ll keep you posted when Haven opens again.

“This sounds NOTHING like me.” 
This is what I said when I started AI early last year to create content. 😅

You type a few prompts into ChatGPT or Claude...
It spits something out that kinda works...
But it sounds robotic, flat, and not like you.

Like it has no soul or depth.

The problem isn’t you.
The problem is how most of us were taught to use AI.

𝗪𝗲 𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗰 𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗸—𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗮 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗼𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿.

⸻

Here’s what changed everything for me:

✅ I stopped asking AI to replace my voice
✅ I started teaching it how I speak, think, and create
✅ Dan helped me build a brand voice doc so my team could use AI without sounding like AI

Now we use AI to:

— Write podcast scripts
— Repurpose transcripts
— Draft LinkedIn posts like this…all without me micromanaging or burning out.
⸻
I recently sat down with my friend, Dan Cumberland 🚀, to talk about using AI for content creation without losing your voice. 

What I most loved about this chat is that it's full of practical things we can all do.

If you’ve ever thought, “𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗔𝗜, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝘆 𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲…”
This new episode is for you. 🙂

https://lnkd.in/eUwE9jM6

Before I became a dad, I recorded podcasts at 3:50 a.m.

I thought that was what success looked like—
stacked calendars, always “on,”
doing everything, every day.

But something shifted.

A NICU baby.
Aging parents.

And a quiet inner voice asking:

“What if you built around energy, not ego?”

So I made a change.

I cut Selling the Couch to two days a week.
I opened space to rest, for prayer, to golf, and to be present.

And one day, this sentence came out of my mouth:

“𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨𝙣’𝙩 𝙩𝙧𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚.”

That was it.
That was the shift.
The moment I realized this was enough.

👉 I shared the full story in this short video.

Would love for you to watch. 🙂

🔗 https://lnkd.in/erfZgMGk

Online courses feel risky right now. 😩

I’ve been creating them for 11 years — through the 2008 crash, COVID, and now AI.

But lately I’ve been wondering:

❓ Will anyone even buy my course?
❓ Is all this effort worth it?

𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝘁𝗚𝗣𝗧 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗚𝗿𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱𝘀...
𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗽𝗮𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗮 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲?

That fear is real. And valid.

⸻

But here’s the shift I’m seeing 👇

𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻’𝘁 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗱.
𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘄𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲.

People no longer want just content.
They want belonging.
They want something made for them.

⸻

What’s working now 🧭

1️⃣ 𝗚𝗼 𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗵𝗲.

One of our students is building a course + support experience for
 South Asian caregivers whose parents are facing Alzheimer’s, cancer, or terminal illness.

It’s personal. Needed. Deeply human.

⸻

2️⃣ 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗴.

People aren’t looking for information.

They’re looking for community.
Somewhere they feel seen.

⸻

3️⃣ 𝗔𝗱𝗱 𝘀𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗴𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 

Not gimmicks. 🎯
Just small wins that build momentum.

⸻

4️⃣ 𝗕𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗼𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 

Position your course in a blue ocean 🌊 —
where students either choose you...
or choose nothing.

⸻

🎙️ I recently recorded a STC podcast on
𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗼 𝗔𝗜-𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗳 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗢𝗻𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲 (𝗡𝗼𝘄 + 𝗜𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲)

I walk through these 4 strategies — with examples. 

🔗 https://lnkd.in/ePSwg3jj

If you’re launching (or reworking) a course in 2026…
this will help. <3

P.S. We're wrapping up our soft launch of Haven, our new community for therapists building and growing their courses, YouTube, podcasts, speaking, and writing.

𝗪𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝟮-𝟯 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗽𝗼𝘁𝘀 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸'𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝗼𝗻 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗼 𝗔𝗜-𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗳 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗖𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗿 𝗙𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗢𝗻𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲.

Please DM me if you've love to chat about it. 🙂

21 years ago, I started my PhD.

I was excited. 

I knew it would be a long road—5+ years of grad school, internship, and postdoc.

But it flew by.
And now, looking back, I wish I had done some things differently.

✅ I got a lot done.
❌ But I wasn’t always strategic with my time.

If I could do it over again...
 • I’d take a basic finance and/or a storytelling class 
 • I’d start building something small on the side: a podcast, a newsletter, even a LinkedIn presence
 • And I’d invest in my nervous system—because this work is heavy 

🎧 I just recorded a podcast episode on this:

“If I Were In Grad School Again, Here’s What I’d Do.”

https://lnkd.in/eiYDxMbe

It’s honest. It’s practical. It’s from the heart.

If you’re in grad school—or mentoring someone who is—this might help. 🙂

QUESTION: If you could speak to your former self who was going through school, what would you tell them? Would love to hear. =) 

“I wish I’d known...” story.

What if you didn’t have to PERFORM your success?

I used to think success had to be loud.
That if I was doing well, people should see it.

But over time, I noticed something:

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗲𝘀𝘁, 𝘄𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄?
𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻’𝘁 𝗼𝗻 𝘀𝗼𝗰𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗺𝗲𝗱𝗶𝗮.
𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗼𝗳𝗳.
𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝗽𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗲.

They value privacy over applause.
Margin over attention.
Freedom over fame.

Now I’m asking different questions:

Does this decision buy more time with my family?
Will this matter in 20 years?
Am I still free?

That’s my definition of wealth now.
Not noise. Not numbers.
But peace.

Recently, I recorded a YouTube video on building generation wealth without performing on social media. 

▶️ https://lnkd.in/ePj676ny

Would love to hear what how you're thinking about this. =)

People Are Watching—Even When You Think No One Is. 👀

When I started my podcast in 2015, I had no idea where it would go.

I was juggling clinical work, trying to understand this whole podcasting thing, and figuring out how to share content that actually helped people.

Honestly? I didn’t think anyone would listen. 😬

I was convinced I needed to be more polished, more experienced—more something—before I had the right to take up space.

But over time, I noticed something surprising...

𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻’𝘁 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.

𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀.

Not for perfection, but for 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗳—that you can start before you’re ready. That you can figure things out along the way. That you don’t need to be an expert to make an impact.

And I see this all the time with therapists who want to create a podcast or an online course. They think they need more credentials, more confidence, or more clarity before they start.

But here’s what I’ve learned: 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗳𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁.

The simple act of showing up—imperfectly, consistently—is what inspires others to believe they can do it too.

You don’t need to be an authority to lead.
You don’t need to be the best to make a difference.
You just need to be willing to start.

Because sometimes, your courage to try is the exact inspiration someone else needs.

Executive Coach | Leadership Advisor | Career Sherpa

👋 Follow for evidence-based strategies on leadership, careers, & organizations — play smarter at the game of work. Get promoted faster.

We spend several thousand dollars and years getting an education. Yet, most of us don’t know how to navigate the world of work. More importantly, how do you play & win?

I’m a former engineer & Fortune 500 manager turned executive coach/leadership advisor. 20 years in various leadership and technical roles in corporate America gave me a first-row seat to many of the things that work and that don’t.

Now I help high performers, managers, and executives, to level up their organizational game and avoid costly career mistakes.

How I can help:

✴️ Mastering ORGANIZATIONAL SAVVY (small-group coaching program on Maven)
Creating impact & being effective in large companies is incredibly hard. But you don’t need a $100k MBA. You need to develop more organizational savvy.

 ↳ Check out details: https://maven.com/leading-sapiens/organizational-savvy

✴️ THE LEADING SAPIENS WEEKLY (free newsletter)
There’s too much noise, not enough signals, and you don’t have time to waste. Each week I share evidence-based strategies on leadership, careers, & organizations, to level up you your game. 

 ↳ Get it: thelsweekly.substack.com

✴️ COACHING (free 30-min strategy call)
 
My best clients fall into 2 categories:

1. High-performers wishing to break into management/leadership roles 
2. First-line/middle managers wanting to play a better game and could use a sparring partner

↳ Set up a free 30 minute strategy call at this link: 
https://calendly.com/sheril-leadingsapiens/30min


✴️ LONG-FORM ARTICLES (free blog)
My blog has 90+ in-depth articles that can help you see the game in a new light. 

↳ Check it out: leadingsapiens.com/tags/

Have feedback? DM or email me: sheril@leadingsapiens.com

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The Battle

Melvin Varghese, PhD

Sheril Mathews

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taplio

The Battle

Melvin Varghese, PhD

Sheril Mathews

Followers

Posts

Engagements

Likes

Performance Score.css-goub6s{font-size:var(--chakra-fontSizes-md);font-weight:500;color:var(--chakra-colors-gray-600);display:block;margin-top:var(--chakra-space-1);}Melvin Varghese, PhD's LinkedIn Performance

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Performance ScoreMelvin Varghese, PhD's LinkedIn Performance