Order my USA TODAY Bestselling book: toxicgrit.com TOXIC GRIT: How to have it all and (actually) love what you have. It will help you create a new approach to ambition and find space for all the diverse parts of yourself. Join 75K+ others who read my newsletter 🧩 Life's a Game at amandagoetz.com. It’s full of free tips to play the game of life at a whole new level. In 2018 I found myself at the height of my marketing career with 3 kids under the age of 4 and filing for divorce. In a world telling me to find alignment......I realized that was impossible. The work version of me didn't want to leave early to go be with the kiddos. The mom version of me didn't want to miss a moment with them. I wanted to be fiercely independent and yet also wanted to find love again. Other versions of me didn't want to feel responsible for anything or anyone. This diversity within me led to the creation of my Character Theory Framework. This framework helped me to create space for the 10 characters that make up the movie of your life:  The CEO → wants to pursue big goalsThe Partner → desires companionship  The Soloist → cares about personal growth and development The Caregiver → deep desire to take care of others and show up for themThe Goddess → wants to be desired and pursue pleasure  The Lazy One → loves to couch rot, no goals whatsoever The Socialite → values connection The Creative → desires creation and creativity The Doctor → your inner health &amp; wellness character The Explorer → craves novelty And it helped me. I was able to let go of the idea of balance and give permission for hierarchy, boundaries and the transition sequences necessary to embody these diverse characters. So I put it all in a book and it was an instant best seller!! I'm so excited for you to create space for all parts of you and to see ambition as multi-dimensional. Follow me here for advice as I build a multi-hyphenate life as a CMO, Author, Mom of 3 and getting married again. 

Amanda Goetz

Wrote a letter about life lately and thoughts I've been having during Women's History Month. Would love to know if anyone else is struggling with this....

https://lnkd.in/e7aNp6NB

USA TODAY Bestselling Author of Toxic Grit | 2x Founder (acquired) 5x CMO | Mom x3 | Keynote Speaker | Subscribe ➡️ 🧩 Life’s a Game Newsletter

SaaS Sales Leader | Writer | Keynote Speaker

We are done with leadership training that doesn't work.

After 25 years in corporate sales leadership and a lifetime in competitive athletics, I founded Giganti Group to build something the world actually needs: a performance transformation practice that delivers real, measurable, lasting results.

Here's what makes us different:

We fuse world-class performance diagnostics with systematic coaching and accountability. We looked at how championship teams are built and asked: What if leadership transformation worked the same way?

The result? Leaders who know themselves deeply. Teams that align around strengths. Companies that stop gambling on growth and start guaranteeing it.

We work with three types of partners:
→ Enterprise leaders building high-performing cultures that don't burn people out
→ Executive teams who refuse to settle for good when they're capable of great
→ Elite sports organizations committed to championship mindset development

Teams win championships. 

That's why I've partnered with the best assessment psychologists and behavior change scientists in the world - combining their diagnostics and technology with the "With Intention" methodology I've spent 25 years developing.

This is not leadership training. This is a performance revolution.

Failure isn't defeat. It's data. Curiosity fuels progress. Impact follows intention. And leaders who grow themselves multiply growth in others.

Background: Former Division I athlete (Bowling Green). 25 years in corporate sales leadership. Author of "With Intention" (USA Today Bestseller). Deep faith in Jesus Christ. Husband to Michelle. Father to three.

Ready to explore what's possible? Visit gigantigroup.com or send me a message.

Jon Giganti

My wife was on the phone for over an hour with our cell phone provider. 

Billing issue. Couldn’t get it resolved. Frustrated. Done.

I said, “Let me try.”

Different call. Different rep. First thing I said: “Hey, can you tell me your name?”

She told me. I said, “Angela, really nice to meet you. 

I know you’ve got a tough job. Really appreciate your time.”

15 minutes. 

Problem solved.

Michelle brought this story up at dinner the other night with friends. She made the point that it was ridiculously simple.

She’s right. It was.

I didn’t have a better argument. I didn’t have more information. 

I just helped Angela feel seen.

Used her name. Acknowledged her work. Treated her like a person.

Chris Voss, the former FBI hostage negotiator, calls it mirroring. Repeat the last few words someone says. 

They keep talking. It works because it signals one thing: I see you.

Customer service rep. Direct report. Spouse. Kid. 

Same principle.

People open up when they feel seen. They get defensive when they don’t.

That’s not a sales tactic. That’s being human.

Founder, Giganti Group | Transforming leaders through science-backed diagnostics + systematic authenticity | Elite performance without burnout

The Phoenix Suns once assigned an intern to count how many times Steve Nash physically connected with his teammates during a game.

Fist bumps. High fives. Pats on the back. Shoulder taps.

The first game they tracked? 239.

Not per season. One game. 

239 touches.

UC Berkeley studied every NBA team and found that the teams who touched the most, won the most. 

Players who gave the most physical encouragement performed better individually too.

Nash wasn’t just the best passer in the league. He was the best teammate. And the research says that’s not a coincidence.

Here’s what I think most leaders miss about this.

It’s not about being “rah rah” or cheerful all the time. It’s about making the people around you feel like they matter. Feel like they’re seen.

A fist bump. A nod. Using someone’s name. 

Eye contact that says “I’m here with you right now.”

These aren’t soft skills. 

They’re the foundation of every high-performing team I’ve ever been on or coached.

239 touches in a single game.

What would happen in your organization if your leaders were that intentional about making people feel seen?

*Hat tip to Alan Stein Jr for sharing this story with me

A fist bump changed the game last week.

I'm coaching my daughter Emerson's indoor soccer team and one of the girls made a mistake. Tried the right play, lost the ball. She looked over at me expecting frustration. 

Instead, I gave her a fist bump and said, "That's exactly what I want. Do it again."

She played different the rest of the game. Looser. More confident. More willing to try.

And it got me thinking about something I don't talk about enough.

The energy you bring as a leader matters more than most of the strategy you'll ever learn.

A fist bump at the right time. A word of encouragement when someone is doubting themselves. A nod that says "I see you." 

These aren't soft skills. They're the skills that unlock everything else.

The Gottman Research talks about a 5 to 1 ratio. For every constructive or critical piece of feedback to land, you need five positive interactions to build the trust that makes it stick. 

Five to one.

That's hard. Especially when you're busy. Especially when you're under pressure.

Especially when you're focused on results.

But here's what I've learned coaching these girls, coaching executives, and just trying to show up well for the people in my life:

People don't perform their best when they're afraid of making mistakes. They perform their best when they know someone believes in them.

That belief gets communicated in small moments. A fist bump. An encouraging word. A genuine "I see what you're doing and it matters."

I'm not saying you don't challenge people. 

You absolutely do. But you earn the right to challenge through encouragement first. Build the trust, then stretch them.

So here's my question for you heading into the weekend:
Who on your team needs a fist bump from you right now?

Not a performance review. Not a strategy session. Just a moment that says: I see you. I believe in you. Keep going.

That might be the most important play you make all week.

I grew up in a loud Italian household. 

Youngest of 3 boys.

There was a lot of love in that house. Big meals together. My mom pouring into us constantly. 

A family that showed up for each other no matter what.

There was also a lot of emotion. Voices got raised. Conflict was a regular visitor.

And somewhere in the middle of all that love and all that chaos, I picked up a skill I didn’t know I was learning.

I learned to read people.

I could hear my mom’s footsteps and know her mood before she walked in the room. I could tell from someone’s breathing whether they were happy, frustrated, or about to blow up.

That wasn’t from a class. 
That was from paying attention.

And when I look back at any success I’ve had in sales, leadership, or coaching, it all traces back to that.

Reading the room. 
Noticing what people aren’t saying. 
Adjusting.

Here’s what I’ve learned: Connection isn’t about what you say. It’s about what you notice.

Use their name. Make eye contact. Let them talk more than you.

Be interested, not interesting.

That’s the whole game.

graphical user interface, application, Teams

I told my girls soccer team something after our game his week that I think every leader needs to hear.

"I don't care if you lose the ball. I care if you don't try the right play."

Here's what I mean.

In youth soccer, kids are taught to just kick it. Clear it. Get rid of it. 

And yeah, that keeps you from turning the ball over. But it also keeps you from ever learning how to actually play.

So I'm teaching these girls a different approach. Trap the ball. Take a touch into space. 

Look up. Scan the field. Find the open player. Then make the pass.

Will they lose the ball sometimes? Absolutely. 

But they're making intentional plays, not panicked reactions.

This is the same work I do with executives and leadership teams.

When pressure hits, our instinct is to react. Move fast. Make the safe call. Clear the ball.

But with intention, the better move is almost always to slow down for a moment. 

Not to be slow. To be intentional.

Here's what that looks like in practice:

Trap the ball. When something lands on your desk or in your inbox, resist the urge to respond immediately. 

Receive it. Give yourself a beat.

Look up and scan the field. 

Before you act, ask: 
What's actually in front of me? 
Who's involved? 
What does this situation really need right now?

Make the right play. Choose the thoughtful response over the fast one. Even if it takes a little longer. Even if you might get it wrong.

The goal isn't perfection. It's intention. 

I told the girls the same thing. Try the right play. If you lose the ball, we'll get it back. But if you never try, you never grow.

Same goes for leadership. The leaders who slow down to see the full picture are the ones who make the plays that actually matter.

I learned an exercise from Chet Scott at Built to Lead called 7 Good Minutes.

Two people. 

One person asks open-ended questions for 7 minutes. 

No agenda. No fixing. Just curiosity. Then you flip.

I ran this with a group of executives last year. Afterwards one guy pulled me aside.

“I learned more about him in 10 minutes than I have in 10 years of working together.”

10 years. 7 minutes of curiosity changed everything.

You’ve probably done this. Worked alongside someone for years. Assumed you knew them. 

Maybe you didn’t.

Here’s my challenge for you this week.

Pick one person. Teammate. Friend. Spouse. Kid. 

Give them 7 minutes of real curiosity. Just questions. No fixing.

See what happens.

Not gonna pretend I’m great at this every day. Ask my wife : )

But as a work in progress, this might be the most important skill you can build right now.

Help the people around you feel seen. 

That’s the whole thing.

Two stories from the same week that taught me the same lesson.

Story one...

Alan Stein Jr. came spoke to my son Gabe's basketball team at Genoa Christian Academy last week. 

The boys are heading into their first OHSAA tournament. Alan talked about the "Next Play" mindset, which is the name of his newest book (a great read I highly recommend).

The concept is simple. Whatever just happened is over. Let it go. 

Move to what's next.

Miss a shot? Next play. 
Turn it over? Next play. 
Hit a big three? Next play.

The way Alan explained it, you could feel it click in the room. The boys were locked in. They asked about dealing with emotions, building confidence in new territory, and how to stay present when the pressure is real.

Story two...

Same week, I'm coaching Emerson's indoor soccer team. 6th and 7th grade girls. And I'm watching them start to get it. 

Instead of just booting the ball every time pressure comes, they're starting to trap it, look up, and try to make the right pass.

One girl lost the ball trying to play through pressure. She looked over at me like she expected to get yelled at. I gave her a fist bump. "That was the right play. Do it again."

Her whole energy shifted. She played with more confidence the rest of the game.

Two different sports. Two different age groups. Same truth.

Whether you're on the court, on the field, or in the boardroom, the best performers aren't the ones who react the fastest. 

They're the ones who stay present, see what's in front of them, and make intentional moves.

And the leaders and coaches who bring the right energy at the right time? 

They unlock something in people that no playbook ever could.

Most leaders are just kicking the ball. Let me explain.

I'm coaching my daughter Emerson's indoor soccer team right now. 6th and 7th grade girls. And I'm watching a pattern that drives me crazy in youth soccer but is even more common in business.

A player gets the ball. Pressure comes. And instead of looking up, scanning the field, and making a good soccer play, they just "boot" it. 

Kick it as hard as they can. 

Somewhere. Anywhere. Just get rid of it.

It feels productive. 

It relieves the pressure. But it's not a play. It's a reaction.

Now think about your last week as a leader.

How many emails did you fire off just to clear your inbox? 
How many decisions did you make just to make them? 
How many conversations did you rush through because you had 12 other things waiting?

You weren't making plays. You were kicking the ball.

We've been conditioned to believe that speed equals effectiveness. That the busier we are, the more we're getting done. That reacting quickly is the same as leading well.

It's not.

The best players on the field aren't the fastest ones. They're the ones who see the field. 

They trap the ball. 
They look up. 
They find the open player. 
They make the right pass, not the quick one.

The best leaders do the same thing.

But it requires something most of us resist: slowing down.

How can you slow down to make a more intentional "play" this week?

Tomorrow I’ll be joining John Murphy  on the FUEL !nc  live stream to talk about something I spend a lot of time helping leaders think about.

Choice Moments.

A Choice Moment is the small space between what happens to us and how we respond.

A tough conversation. A mistake. A setback. A moment of pressure.

Something happens and we immediately start telling ourselves a story about it.

That story drives what we do next.

Most people never slow down long enough to notice that moment.

But the best leaders do.

They recognize the moment, choose who they want to be, and respond with intention.

It sounds simple. But learning to do this consistently can completely change how you lead, how you perform, and how you handle adversity.

Looking forward to the conversation tomorrow!

Global Authority, Author, Consultant, and Keynote Speaker on Change Mastery, Operational Excellence, Lean, and High-Performance Teamwork. Esteemed faculty member of Fuel, Inc. Included in Marquis Who’s Who. of America

Join me Friday, March 6th, at 11am EST with special guest and fellow FUEL !nc instructor Jon Giganti for some deep insight and practical advice on making the most of "choice moments." #Leadership #Wisdom #Inspiration #Motivation #Fearless #Confidence

Open article: Welcome! You are invited to join a webinar: Does Fear Drive Us or Do We Drive the Response?. After registering, you will receive a confirmation email about joining the webinar. by us02web.zoom.us

Welcome! You are invited to join a webinar: Does Fear Drive Us or Do We Drive the Response?. After registering, you will receive a confirmation email about joining the webinar.

Something happens. 

Your brain tells a story. 

You react.

That sequence plays out dozens of times a day. Most of the time you don’t even notice it.

But there’s a small space in there. 

Maybe a second or two. Between the story and the response.

I call it The Choice Moment.

Here’s an example. 
Your client pushes back on pricing. 

Your brain says, “They don’t value what I do.” 

That story drives a defensive response. The conversation goes sideways.

But what if you caught the story before it drove the response?

What if in that one or two seconds you asked yourself: 

Who do I want to be right now?

Calm. Curious. Courageous.

Pick one. 

The response usually takes care of itself.

That’s it. That’s the whole framework. 

Stimulus. Story. Choice Moment. Response. Result.

The moment you start catching the story is the moment everything changes.

Maybe you’re measuring from the wrong direction.

I catch myself doing this all the time. Looking at where I want this business to go and feeling like I’m not there yet.

Then I stop. And measure backward instead.

A year ago I didn’t have this business. Two years ago I was still in corporate. Five years ago I couldn’t have imagined this path.

That’s a lot of progress I was ignoring.

Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy call this “The Gap and the Gain.” 

When you measure forward against your ideal, you’re always behind. When you measure backward against where you started, you see how far you’ve actually come.

I just joined Dan’s Strategic Coach program. This concept was one of the first things that hit me. And it hit hard. 

Because I realized I was spending most of my energy in the gap.

This isn’t about lowering the bar. Keep pushing.

But measure backward this week. Just once. 

See how it feels.

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