A-Game Consultancy

Director

Big Roar Coaching

Owner

On the surface everything looks successful. The business is moving forward, the money is fine, and the image looks good.

Underneath it feels very different. You are exhausted, stressed, and running on fumes. Alcohol becomes the quick fix, the reward, the escape. But it costs you clarity, control, and confidence.

The habits that once drove your success begin to slip. Your health starts to pay the price. The life you have built feels nothing like the one you wanted.

This is where change begins.

We work with men who are ready to step into sobriety, live in alignment, and build self mastery. Men who want to rebuild their health, sharpen their focus, and create freedom that lasts.

Sobriety gives clarity. Alignment gives direction. Self mastery makes it stick.

That is how you thrive in life and business

Adam Smith

It’s f*cking mental that going sober can still be seen as negative, 


Lose weight? “You look amazing”

Stop smoking? “Well done to you”

Leave a bad relationship? “Great news, it obviously wasn’t working”

Remove alcohol? “Did you have a problem”

Then comes the gaslighting. “I can have a few and I’m fine, you just need to learn how to moderate”

Again, we don’t go up to up to someone that’s overweight and say “why did you stop eating junk food and do all that exercise? You just need to learn how to moderate” 

Also, what if you did have a problem with alcohol? Isn’t the point of human existence to solve problems and grow? 

There’s so much shame still attached to it so there’s no wonder so many people still drink it though they want to stop. 

When you do remove alcohol, every single area of your life gets better and the only regret you’ll have is that you didn’t do it sooner. 

I couldn’t care less if you drink. If you do remove it or take a break from alcohol however, it will change your life in ways you can’t imagine. 

I’m hosting a webinar next Wednesday at 12pm uk time. How to stop drinking, fix your habits, reduce stress and more. Follow the link in the comments. 

P.s. What more can be done to combat this lazy narrative? Comment below

You’re thriving in business but sabotaging your health and home life. Through sobriety, accountability, and action, you rebuild trust, strength, and purpose to become the man your family deserves.

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I stopped drinking alcohol over 1,950 days ago,  


My life has changed enormously since and yours can too, 

-Clearer skin
-Lost weight
-Set up my own business 
-Reduced blood pressure 
-Reduced cholesterol 
-More present with my family 
-More emotionally intelligent 
-Saved god knows how much money 
-Gained so many great relationships 
-Helped change the lives of hundreds of others
-Increased self worth 
-No suicidal thoughts 
-No pissed up arguments 
-No hangovers 

Every area of my life has improved since stopping drinking and it’s the single best decision I ever made.

I help others do this too. If you’re a founder and want to make more profit, become healthier and be more present, I’m only a message away. 
 
Are you alcohol free? What benefits have you seen? Comment below

Founders hire me to transform their mindset, health and performance so they think clearly, lead with confidence, increase profit and stay present at home while building a life of real freedom.

6 years ago I was sacked from the most toxic job I’ve ever had, 


They said my face didn’t fit their “culture”.

The organisation was about as “cultured” as a urinal cake from a working men’s club. 

Today I’m in London with my business partner as we’ve been nominated for best start up in the UK and I’ve been nominated for best neurodiverse founder as well. 

I am so grateful for those absolute whoppers that me set me free from a job I despised so I could find my true calling. 

Sometimes it’s not rejection, it’s redirection. 

Wish us luck.

“Adam, someone did a post about you the other day slagging you off”


And? 

Sounds like a them problem. People are so desperate for gossip and chaos. 

3 people have messaged me directly to tell me someone did a post slating me. 

I post content everyday for 2 reasons. 1. To help people. 2. To make money. 

When you post content you leave yourself wide open for criticism. Some will love it, some will hate it. 

Thats the trade off of putting yourself out there everyday. 

Often the criticism is from someone that’s  only post was to announce how delighted they were to being promoted as Chief Helmet Officer at Absolute Whopper Incorporated. 

I get to decide what it means. Ultimately, it’s just words on a screen. It doesn’t define me and what matters most is my opinion of me. 

I’ll keep posting content and changing lives. It’s what I was born to do. I’ll leave the keyboard warriors to criticise, it means I’m doing something right. 

How do you deal with trolls? Comment below

Well, we didn’t win, 


I was nominated for best Neurodiverse Entrepreneur of the year in the UK, 

We were also nominated for best service based start up. 

We didn’t win and I’m gutted. Thats the thing about being neurodivergent, perceived losses and rejection hit that much harder. In reality, I know it isn’t rejection, but the instantaneous response will always be there. 

That said, I am very grateful to have been there and if you would have told me 5 years ago when we started A-Game that we would be here, I would have laughed at you. 

Also, due to the amount of work I’ve done on myself I was pleased for the people that won as they were absolutely buzzing. 

For years I was told I had “potential”. My parents were told by teachers to “manage their expectations”.

Being employed wasn’t always easy for me for numerous reasons. 

I didn’t take rejection or criticism well. Still have challenges with it to be honest. 

My time keeping was ok but not exemplary.

I hated admin and the higher up I went the more I had to do. 

My ideas would often get ignored (some of them were shit to be fair 🤣)

So to have a category for people that were told they didn’t fit their mould of modern society is amazing in itself. To be recognised with a nomination is incredible. 

So while I would have loved to win, it really is about following the process and remembering that I won’t be appreciated/understood by everyone and I’m not supposed to be. 

Are you neurodivergent? How do you deal with set backs? Comment below

Office Christmas parties are one of the single most destructive things you can do for your business, 

Before I became a coach I worked in hospitality for 14 years and I saw it all. 

❌2 people threw glasses at me when I wouldn’t serve them

❌Countless injuries and unnecessary fights between staff. 

❌So many people saying shit to their boss that they shouldn’t. 

❌The boss saying shit to people that they shouldn’t 🤣

❌Jonny big bollocks getting flattened by the bouncer after being refused entry. 

❌Company credit card getting a beasting 

Most don’t want to attend and yet they feel obliged to. 

There is often no consideration for people that don’t drink alcohol either. 

I have seen countless people destroy their careers over the years. 

They get pressured to attend by the senior management team and then get fed bottomless alcohol and they then wonder why their behaviour is so bad…. It’s a real head scratcher isn’t it? 

So if you are attending your Christmas party really think about what you want the outcome to be, no one ever got promoted at Christmas party but many people have lost their job. 

Am I saying don’t have fun and celebrate? No. But does that mean you have to get absolutely wankered in the name of “building morale”? Also no. 

You can socialise, dance and sing without alcohol and still get home, job in tact, good nights sleep and a productive start to your day tomorrow. 

Something to think about.

I've never had a dog before and couldn't quite comprehend how attached people were to their pets. 

That was until this little rascal came into our lives and I now realise I would take a bullet for her. 

There's a certain level of love and loyalty that just can't be replicated by anything else. 

She's hilarious, cheeky, playful, loving, naughty, comforting and ridiculous in equal measure. (As pictured) 

Today is Gracie's 6th birthday and I can't express just how much she means to us. 

She's the best therapist I've ever had. No weird wanky linkendIn lesson here, just an appreciation post. 

Put your dog pics below 😁

A client of mine lied to me on a call, I called him out on it and couldn’t believe his reaction, 


He told me he was pushing himself so hard because he wanted to “give his family the best life possible.”
 He genuinely believed it.

I challenged him on it. 

“Is this really about your family? Or is it about you feeling insecure?” 

He went home after being away for a week with work and his wife said their son had asked why he never talks to him anymore.
 The kid thought his own dad didn’t like him.

He told me the buzz from that deal disappeared instantly.

Here’s the reality most business owners avoid:
A lot of the overworking isn’t about being a great provider at all. It’s insecurity dressed up as responsibility.
 Work becomes the safe place where you know what you’re doing, and home becomes the place you quietly hope sorts itself out.

At work you feel competent. At home you’re not sure what’s expected, so you stay in the environment where you feel in control and call it “sacrifice.”

He eventually admitted he was hiding behind the idea of “doing it all for them,” when really he was doing it because it was the only area of his life where he felt confident.

So we stripped it back and made his personal life something he intentionally worked on.

He started being present. 

He communicated with his wife properly. 

He spent genuine time with his son rather than squeezing him into the gaps of his week. 

Nothing dramatic, nothing Hollywood, just consistent effort in the right direction.

Six months later his son sprints to the door when he gets home. 

He told me that watching his boy score at the weekend felt better than closing that contract. 

He laughed and said, “Turns out I wasn’t a bad dad, I was just never there.”

This is the part no one wants to admit:
Most men aren’t “doing it for the family.”
 They’re doing it because they don’t know who they are without work propping them up.

You can grow a successful business and still be the kind of father and partner your family actually wants around.
 But you won’t do it while hiding behind the old story.

If you want clarity, structure and someone who will hold you to the standard you keep avoiding, we can have a discovery call to see if I can help you. 

How do you put in boundaries between work and home life? Comment below

Life and Business Coach for founders who want clarity, faster decisions, more profit, and real freedom without burning out or losing their family.

Doing hard shit prepares you for hard shit, 


I used to be so weak. 

Not physically, but mentally.

Using alcohol to escape my emotions. Turning to junk food as a vice for “comfort”. 

Going to pure gym and doing nothing but bro lifting. Everyday was arm day 🤣

The biggest flex I have now is that my 37 year old self would destroy my 25 year old in every metric. 

It’s essential to put yourself in uncomfortable situations in order to grow and it’s something I do everyday. I refer to it as intentional adversity. 

This is me pushing 300kg on the sled push. Why? Why not. 

Doing hard shit like this pushes me each day and helps me deal with the challenges life throws at me. 

What do you do each day to prepare your mind and body? 

P.s. We are hosting an event next Wednesday at 12pm about how to optimise your performance, reduce stress, destroy limiting beliefs and more. Link in the comments

The term personal brand makes my teeth itch,



Well it used to. 

The main reason why is because I misunderstood it. 

That said, it’s a term that is often overused and I have seen countless business owners getting fleeced by people selling them the dream about “building a brand and clients will queue round the corner”.

I absolutely disagree with that. 

I think you have to build a business first. One that actually helps people solve their problem. 

Then you can focus on building a “personal brand”. 

That’s the order I did it in and now we’re getting opportunities aplenty. 

After 5 years of building a successful business, not because I took an online course about bright coloured presentations on canva and filming myself drinking a coffee. 

This year alone there’s been so many great things happen in my life. 

-Coached hundreds of people and helped them change their lives. 

-Formed a great corporate partnership with ADHD360  

-Featured in a book with several other successful Neurodiverse founders. Put together by Frankie James Phil Anderton and John Reynolds 

-First Tv appearance on the docuseries ADHD Beyond The Label.  

-Guest appearance on one of the biggest UK podcasts Eventful Lives hosted by Dodge Woodall 

-Asked to speak to a roomful of successful entrepreneurs by Chris James 

-Invited on 30 podcasts 

-Sold out 2 mens retreats

 -Joined a mastermind with 30 other business owners ran by the legend Phil Graham 

-Nominated for The Allica Bank Great British Entrepreneur Awards for best start up 

And next year we already have so many great things lined up. 

So while a personal brand is important, it’s imperative you build a successful business first. 

What are your thoughts on this? Comment below

Client closed a £1.25m deal and went home buzzing, he was shocked at what was waiting for him at home, 

His wife looked at him and said: 
“Your daughter asked me today if you even like her."

He’d spent 4 months negotiating that deal.
Late nights, strategic planning and endless trains down to London. 

He’d spent about 6 minutes total with his daughter that week.

Here’s what kills me:

You’ll spend 3 hours preparing for a board meeting.
⤷ You won’t spend 3 minutes asking your kid about their day.

You’ll track revenue KPIs obsessively.
⤷ You have no clue what your wife actually needs.

Then you wonder why success feels so empty.

He asked me:

“Is it possible to feel accomplished in my personal life the way I do professionally?"

Mate, you already have the skills.
Strategic thinking. Problem-solving. Showing up consistently.
You only apply them at work.

What he did:

Hired me. Then we got a plan in place. 

Scheduled family time, like board meetings. Non-negotiable.

Actually asked his wife what she needed.

Learned what his kids cared about.

Showed up. Consistently.

Six months later, his daughter runs to the door when he gets home.

And he felt the same buzz watching his kid score a goal as closing that deal.
Maybe more.

You can build a £5 million company, but can’t rebuild a relationship with your kid?

Bollocks.

You just haven’t decided it’s worth the same effort.

You’re applying world-class strategy to your business and not to your family’s future.

Most men tell me:
"I’m doing this for my family."

Nah mate. You’re doing it for you.
Your family doesn’t want the bigger house.
They want YOU. Actually present.
Your move.

Are you willing to apply the same intensity to the people who actually matter?

Or keep building empires whilst your family falls apart?

Reading my content is all well and good but it won’t move the needle, hiring me and my team will. Drop me a message with the word “Ready” if you want clarity, strategy and accountability. 

P.s. I’m hosting an event tomorrow at 12pm. If you want to perform at your highest level, this is for you. Link in the comments.

“You should never make friends with your clients”


Bollocks. For a meaningful relationship to form, trust must be built. I can’t expect any of my clients to be vulnerable with me if I can’t be with them. 

Over the last few years Rich Casement has achieved so many amazing things and to be part of that journey has been an honour. 

Been alcohol free for 4 years, left a job he wasn’t aligned with, started his own business and has run countless marathons. 

We’ve since formed a great friendship and the fact we can meet for a walk and coffee while discussing our wins and challenges is a great gift as most of my friendships were based on alcohol and bull shit for many years. 

Yes I have boundaries in place with everyone I work with but I also believe to have authentic connection with someone, you must be able to fully be yourself to build more trust. 

Rich is just one of hundreds of great relationships I have formed over the years and it’s the greatest honour I could wish for when running my own business. 

Rich changed his life by asking for help, you can do the same too. I’m only a message away.

P.s. What are your thoughts on this? Comment below

Shots fired 😅
Most recovery programmes have a 30-40% success rate. Ours has 92%.

Look, I'm not here to slag off AA or traditional recovery. They’ve helped millions of people, and that matters if they work for you, brilliant.

But here's what I've learnt after working with 500+ high-performers over 5 years:

Traditional recovery is built for people who've lost everything. You haven't lost everything. You're succeeding professionally whilst struggling personally. Your rock bottom is most people's peak performance.

That requires an entirely different approach.

Here's The Difference:

Traditional Recovery:

Assumes you've lost job, family, health
One-size-fits-all protocols
Group rooms where you're the only one in a suit
Focuses on willpower and meetings

The A-Game Method:

You're crushing it at work, struggling at home
DNA testing for YOUR specific biology
Science + mindset + peer community who get it
Built for executives who understand complexity

It's not better or worse. It's different. Because you're different.

What You Get:

Sobriety → DNA testing + nutritional therapy + mindset rewiring. Not just stopping drinking. Understanding why you started.

Alignment → Rebuild relationships. Address the ADHD/neurodivergent factors (70% of our clients). Fix what drove you to self-medicate.

Self-Mastery → Lead from clarity. Make decisions without 2 AM regret spirals. Build a life you don't want to escape from.

The Results:

✓ 500+ high-performers transformed
 ✓ 92% success rate (industry average: 35%)
 ✓ Specialisation: Executives with ADHD/neurodiversity
 ✓ Average client ROI: £100K+

Real outcomes: CEOs leading with clarity, marriages rebuilt, health restored, lives they don't want to escape from.

Who This Is For: Successful but unfulfilled. Self-medicating with alcohol. Crushing it at work, struggling at home. Ready to do actual work, not just talk. Done with generic wellness bullshit.

Who This Isn't For: Looking for quick fixes. Unwilling to address root causes. Can't commit to 12 weeks. Not actually ready to quit.

The Guarantee: Complete the full 12-week protocol and don't see measurable improvement? We'll work with you until you do.

That's how confident we are in the SAS Framework.

This isn't for everyone. But if you're a high-performer who's tired of feeling like shit whilst appearing successful, let's talk.

DM me "A-GAME"

30-minute confidential strategy call. All conversations completely private. Zero judgement. Just honest assessment of where you are and where you want to be.

Your move, executive.

Stop escaping your life. Start building one you don't want to escape from.

You can’t drink alcohol and perform at your best, 


Can you make money? Yes. 

Can you be healthy? Yes. 

Can you be happily married? Yes. 

Can you perform at YOUR best? No. 

The thing is, it’s the ugly mirror most people don’t want to look in. 

Even if you only have 1-2 drinks on a Saturday night, it’s ruining your sleep and productivity levels the next day. 

Are you happy not showing up as your best self for you and your family 52 days a year? Nearly 2 months? 

Now I know you might be thinking “I drink and I’m fine” or “I drink and I’m successful”.

Good for you, but not my point. You could be performing at even higher levels and be even more happy/fulfilled. 

“I would be happier drinking with my mates than if I stopped”. 

Nope. Alcohol makes you feel that way in the moment but it also increases anxiety and stress so it’s just not factually correct. 

Am I saying you shouldn’t socialise then? Fuck no. You just don’t need a liquid to have a good time. 

“But I don’t want to stop drinking, I like it”

Good for you. I don’t care. 

If you are reading this and you’re sick of drinking and know you’re better without it however, I’m your guy. 

As you were.

Adam. 

P.s. What are your thoughts on this? Comment below

Most people think sobriety is about what you lose. The truth? It’s about what you gain. In this live, we’ll talk honestly about the real reason high performers drink, what’s waiting on the other side when you stop, and how going alcohol-free rewires your entire mindset. No preachy nonsense, just straight talk on clarity, confidence, and becoming who you’re meant to be.

We’re going live to talk about what really happens when you take a break from alcohol. Not the surface-level stuff, but the real changes that happen physically, mentally and emotionally.

We’ll cover:

What to expect in the first 30, 60 and 90 days without alcohol

The truth about moderation and why it keeps most people stuck

How to handle social pressure when everyone else is drinking

Why life without alcohol isn’t boring, it’s clear

The kind of support and accountability that actually works

If you’ve ever thought about taking a break but keep finding reasons not to, this Live will give you the clarity and confidence to get started.

“I’d do anything for my kids”. Would you stop drinking alcohol for them? 

Would you actually prioritise your health for them? 

Would you put your work laptop away at the kitchen table for them? 

Would you say no to that client and instead go home and read a bedtime story for them?

You’ve hit almost every metric when it comes to being “successful”.

You have the house, the car, the family, the nice watch etc etc 

Everyone is envious of what you have but you hate who you’re becoming and have lost yourself along the way. 

You’ve become all to familiar with the spare bedroom and your kids being indifferent to you.

It’s exhausting isn’t it?

Imagine this instead;

✅You nail it at work because you’re more productive than ever. 

✅You use effective communication with your team and clients while setting new boundaries.

✅Your laptop and phone go away as you enter the house. 

✅Your kids and partner are excited to see you. 

✅You share laughs at the dinner table. 

✅You put them to bed and for once, they ask if Dad can read the story. 

✅You sit down with your partner and watch your favourite show together. 

A house full of love and not just more designer gear to try and impress the lads. Sounds nice doesn’t it? 

DM me, book a call and I’ll help you change your fucking life. It’s what I do best. 

Not ready for that step just yet? Come to my free training next Wednesday at 12pm UK TIME. Link in the comments. 

P.s. How do you make sure you show up for your family? Comment below

Your family doesn’t need your money, they need you, 


“I do everything for my family”

Yet you get home after spending another 5 hours on a deal and now they’re in bed. 

“I would die for my kids”

Would you go sober and get healthy for them? 

Look, I get it. I’m not attacking you, I have a deep level of empathy for where you’re at and want to hold you to a higher standard. 

You’re holding back from being truly fulfilled due to the guilt you’re carrying around like a dead weight. 

You don’t feel worthy of happiness so you start to sabotage it. You avoid the gym yet again. 

You promise yourself it’s the last glass of wine before reaching for a bottle…. Again. 

You tell your kids you’ll play with them after work but don’t get home until 10pm. Again. 

It’s exhausting isn’t it? Just for a second, picture the following. 

-Your business still thrives but doesn’t demand every minute of your time. 

-Your partner has never been more drawn to you and wants to have sex with you. 

-Your kids are excited for you to get home. 

-You’re hitting fitness goals that didn’t think would be possible after you turned 40. 

-You can sit with your thoughts and not feel anxious or dependent on alcohol to numb them. 

This is exactly what I’ve helped 500+ high achievers do and you could be next. 

Message me with the word “Ready” if you want my help. 

P.s. How do you put boundaries in between a work and home life? Comment below

“People with ADHD can’t stick to anything” 


They get distracted easily. 

They are impulsive. 

They can’t focus. 

These are just labels that others attach to something they know nothing about. 

You don’t have to take on other people’s labels, they don’t define you. 

I’ve been studying Spanish recently and have a 133 day streak currently. 

Here’s how I’ve stuck to it (this can apply to any habit) 

-Set reminders (and lots of them) 
-Block it out in your calendar 
-Set yourself up to succeed 
-Set your environment up properly 

It really is that simple.

The only limits are the ones you put onto yourself. 

How do you stick to your habits? Comment below

Most sobriety advice is designed for people who’ve lost everything. 
You haven't lost everything. 
You're succeeding professionally while struggling personally.
That requires completely different strategies.

Here are 7 counterintuitive tips that actually work for high-performers:

1. Don’t Quit Alcohol. Quit The Identity.
Stop saying “I’m trying not to drink."
Start saying “I don’t drink."
Your brain follows your identity, not your intentions.
The shift from “trying” to “being” changes everything.

2. Replace The Dopamine Hit (Don’t Just Remove It)
Your brain needs dopamine. If you remove alcohol without replacing the hit, you’ll white-knuckle it for weeks, then relapse.

What works: morning cardio (45+ minutes), cold showers, and high-intensity work sessions.

Your brain doesn’t care where the dopamine comes from. Give it better sources.

3. Test Your DNA (Willpower Isn’t Enough)
Some people metabolise alcohol 3x slower due to genetic variants.
Others have inefficient stress-response pathways, which make coping more challenging.

Knowing your biology changes the game. We test 50+ markers with every client.

4. Build Your Tribe (Not Your Willpower)
Solo recovery has a 35% success rate. 
Community-based recovery has an 87% success rate.
You don’t need more discipline. 
You need peers who understand the specific pressure of high-performance roles.

5. Don’t Count Days. Track Performance Metrics.
"I’m 47 days sober” focuses on what you’ve given up.
“My decision-making improved 40% since quitting” focuses on what you’ve gained.

High performers respond to performance data, not milestones of abstinence.

6. Address The Root Cause (Not The Symptom)

Most executives don’t have an alcohol problem. They have a stress-management problem that alcohol temporarily solves.

Fix the root cause: ADHD, trauma, identity issues, and relationship problems.
The drinking fixes itself when you address what you’re medicating.

7. Give Yourself Permission To Invest
You’ll spend £50K on business coaching without blinking.

But hesitate to spend £10K on the program that saves your marriage and your health?

The ROI on reclaiming your life dwarfs any business investment.

The Pattern:

Traditional recovery treats alcohol as the enemy.
Executive recovery treats alcohol as a symptom of deeper issues.
That’s why our approach works when others fail.

Be honest: 

Which of these 7 are you already doing? None of them? Then you’re still white-knuckling it and wondering why willpower isn’t working. 

DM me and let’s build your actual exit strategy from the bottle. 

Stop managing it. Start mastering it.

P.s. Are you alcohol free? Comment below

Mel Fox Dhar Coaching

Career Coach

Career Growth Coaching

Day One Careers

Behavioural Interview Coach

Amazon

Senior Product Marketing Lead, UK Prime

Senior Product Marketing Lead, Fire Tablets (EU)

Senior Product Marketing Manager,  Fire TV (Global)

Training Lead, Amazon Field Sales

Channel Marketing Manager, Amazon Devices

Microsoft

Channel Marketing Manager, Office

Travel Leaders Corporate, LLC

Team Lead, Training and Member Development

Verizon Wireless

Assistant Manager Retail Sales

University of Colorado at Boulder

Graduate Teaching Assistant

Amazon + Microsoft recognized leader | Proven coaching programs to help you land a job you love

You’ve worked too hard to feel this stuck.

You’ve led high-stakes projects, delivered results that mattered, and climbed further than most ever will.
But somewhere along the way, the work stopped feeling like it fit.

Maybe the role’s too small now.
Maybe the company’s changed.
Maybe you have.

I know what that moment feels like — because I’ve lived it.

The first time I left a “perfect” job, it made no sense to anyone but me.

On paper, I’d made it.
I was at Amazon, leading product marketing for high-profile products like Prime and Fire tablets.

I’d started in academia and retail, then landed at Microsoft in a role that valued my retail background (who knew?). That move brought me from D.C. to Seattle.

Just as I’d settled in, Amazon came knocking — asking me to get offline retailers ready for the Fire Phone launch. That move took my Big Tech career to a whole new level.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling something didn’t fit.
The work moved faster, the bar kept shifting higher — but my sense of purpose was shrinking.

When I looked around, I saw smart, capable colleagues stay in roles they no longer loved because the comp or title looked good. I realised I was on the same path — and I didn’t want to be.

So I walked away and rebuilt my career on different terms.
Ones that gave me impact and energy.
Ones that felt tangible, sustainable, and worth showing up for.

That change in focus led me to coaching.

Now, I help experienced Big Tech professionals navigate bold career moves — especially when they want their next step to look nothing like their last.

How we work together:
🧭 Clarity – Define your values, strengths, and direction
🎯 Job Search – Own your story and land roles you actually want
🚀 First 90 Days – Lead with purpose from day one in your new role

Results my clients see:
✅ Leadership roles at companies they believe in
✅ Bigger comp and better alignment
✅ Confidence in interviews, negotiations, and decisions
✅ A definition of success that fits their life

Because you’re too smart to waste your best years in the wrong role.
Especially when the next chapter can be the best one yet.

Want to know how coaching can accelerate your career? 
📅 Book your 20-minute clarity call:
https://calendly.com/mfdcoaching/clarity

Mel Fox Dhar

In my eight years at Amazon, I 𝙗𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙮 touched my LinkedIn.

I know. Shocking.
But honestly? I figured if someone wanted to find me, they would.
I had “Sr. Product Marketing Manager at Amazon” and a couple bullets about launches.
Street cred = handled. 
Or so I thought.

But that’s not how it works anymore.
Recruiters aren’t sending “I’m hiring for this role...” messages out of the goodness of their hearts. They’re sending them to people who look like the solve the problem they're hiring for - and chances are, your dusty job-title-only profile doesn’t do that.

So if you’ve been “off the market” for a while and your LinkedIn is basically a museum of past job titles, now’s the time to fix it.

Join my masterclass on crafting a recruiter-magnet LinkedIn profile.
December 3 at 10:30am PT / 18:30 GMT.

https://lnkd.in/eesUgS2F

Land & Thrive in a Role You Love | Career Coach for Big Tech | 10 Years at Amazon + Microsoft

I was a barista for four years, and early in my coffee career my manager told me something I never forgot:

“You’ve said ‘good morning, sunshine’ 150 times today.
But for each person, it’s the first time they’re hearing it.”

That line comes back to me every time a client says:
“Mel, I’m exhausted. I’ve had so many interviews. I cannot force enthusiasm anymore.”

I get it.

But here’s the tricky part:
𝗙𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝗲𝗿, 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂.
They don’t see the 7 interviews before this.
They don’t know you’re burned out or drained or one rejection away from screaming into a pillow.
They only know the version of you sitting in front of them.

And if your tone is flat, your shoulders slump, or your answers sound heavy...
They read it as 𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁, not 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗲.

And maybe the insight that this is their first “good morning, sunshine” is enough for you to show up differently. 

But for a lot of people who are deep in interview fatigue and job search burnout, that reminder isn’t enough to flip the switch.

So, here’s a 𝟵𝟬-𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀:
Before your interview, close your eyes and picture yourself in a role where you actually thrive... 
• your work is appreciated
• you’re challenged in the right way
• you’re excited to show up every day
• you feel like yourself again

Let your mind and body remember what it feels like to be in a place that fits you.

We don’t know yet if this role is 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦,
but reconnecting to that vision shifts your tone, posture, and presence in a way nothing else can.

We're not here to fake enthusiasm. 
We're here to be energised by a vision of 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 - borrowing that mojo so you can show up as your best self 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸.

> I'm curious - what helps you get your 'game-face' on? 


P.S. My customer-facing days continued long into my tech career - here’s me demoing the Fire Phone near the Santa Monica pier with our Amazon Devices taco truck.

Mel  Fox Dhar

(8) Marla Bitter, GMS-T, SHRM-SCP | LinkedIn

li_at

JSESSIONID

Feed | LinkedIn

Talks about #career, #bigtech, #purpose, #coaching, and #professionalgrowth

In my 3.5 years of sobriety, here’s the biggest thing I’ve learned about the holidays: They’re a stress test for your coping mechanisms.

You walk in the door and suddenly the routines that keep you sane get tossed aside - and before you know it, you’re slightly off your center.

I get it. I just spent two weeks with my family for my sister-in-law’s wedding. Beautiful time, lots of joy... and also a reminder that being in childhood spaces can press buttons you forgot you had.

Even if sobriety isn’t your “thing,” everyone has something that gets tested during the holidays:
- the relative whose politics make you clench your jaw
- questions about your habits or job search
- slipping back into teenage-you
- losing your routines
- the casual flow of alcohol

None of this means your family is terrible - it means you’re human.
Old environments can pull you into patterns you don’t live in anymore.

Here’s what helps me stay grounded. Not rules, just my toolkit. 
Take what fits, skip the rest.

1️⃣ 𝗦𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗿𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲 (𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝗮 𝘁𝗶𝗻𝘆 𝗽𝗶𝗲𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝘁).
Routines are anchors that tell your nervous system, 
“You’re safe. You’re you.”

I keep the basics: morning coffee alone, a walk or a quick workout, reading a chapter, skincare. The routine itself doesn’t matter - the consistency does.

2️⃣ 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁.
For me, that’s Nosecco or something that feels special. If everyone else is toasting, I want something celebratory too. Much better than a pity glass of water. 

My go-to is to bring extra and position it as something for everyone - plenty of people switch to NA options later (breastfeeding, driving, or just done drinking), this takes the focus from 'sobriety'. 

Easy win-win.

3️⃣ 𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝘅𝗶𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝘆.
Not dramatic - just clarity.
The hubs and I plan the high sign to leave and the threshold for how long we’re staying.

If mimosas start at 10am? Maybe I arrive at 11. Maybe I run to the store. Maybe I take three walks. 

Knowing I can step away helps me stay present when I’m there.

4️⃣ 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝗱, 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗰𝘁.
Anything that keeps me in adult-me, not old-patterns-me:
a lap around the block
five deep breaths
playing with kids
helping in the kitchen
taking a beat before speaking

Tiny resets. Big impact.

5️⃣ 𝗪𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗻 - 𝗶𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝘀 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴.
It’s not about controlling the environment; it’s about supporting yourself inside it.

When I know what grounds me, how I’ll handle the moments that press my buttons, and where I’ll take space, I don’t brace.

I know that I’m ready and that I have my own back.

If you’ve got a holiday survival trick - drop it below. 👇

Someone else will absolutely use it this season.

Here’s an lesson from my time at Amazon that I don’t usually talk about.
The one where I realized great results don’t matter if you’re in the wrong room.

Two years into my Amazon career, I landed a role I was genuinely excited about.
Big scope. Huge potential. Exactly what I wanted...
...until it wasn’t.

Six months in, my manager changed.
The dynamics changed.
And without realizing it, my reputation with a few key stakeholders changed too.

My work was strong.
My customers were happy.

But the people who had to sign off on my promotion?
They didn’t see me the way I saw myself.
I spent another full year trying to “prove” I was ready.
Trying to win over people who had already made up their minds.

A lot of mid-career folks get stuck in the same loop.
You think loyalty will be rewarded.
You think one more good project will turn things around.
You think next cycle will be different.

Most of the time? It won’t.
I’ll share the full story - and the shift that finally got me unstuck - in the video below.

If you’re feeling boxed out, misread, or stalled, this might help you see your situation more clearly.

Sometimes the question isn’t,
“How do I get promoted here?”
It’s
“Should I be here at all?”

Been in a similar situation? Drop your story in the comments below.

Layoffs hit hard - even when you don't love your job

Maybe you were already thinking about leaving. 
But now you've been laid off. 
The sudden shift is a knock to your confidence and creates uncertainty. 
It can make you doubt things you were completely sure of just a week before.

And the natural instinct is to compensate by moving fast:
Fix the resume. Rewrite the LinkedIn. Apply to anything that looks passable. Say yes to every recruiter conversation.

But in my experience, that rush usually comes from fear, not strategy.

When your confidence has taken a hit, the most useful thing you can do is *pause* - not forever, just for long enough to process what happened and reconnect with what you actually want next. That small step back helps you make decisions that are grounded, rather than reactive.

When I work with clients, we take that exploratory approach up front. We look at what they enjoy, what kind of work energises them, and what they want to move toward - not just away from.

And I’ve consistently seen that this doesn’t slow people down.

I’ve had clients land roles in as little as six weeks. Most land within four to six months - in a market where the average job search takes eight to ten.

Stepping back to get clear doesn’t put you behind. If anything, it helps you avoid the detours and false starts that *do* cost time.

So if you’re navigating a layoff right now, give yourself permission to pause. Take a week or two. Have a few honest conversations with trusted mentors about what you bring to the table. Sort through what you want your next chapter to look like.

That clarity is what helps you move forward with purpose, rather than panic.

I'll be rooting for you from the sidelines.

I did something this week that felt both extremely responsible
...and extremely “wow, this is my life now.”
I started scheduling my 2026 calendar.

Not just the workshops.
Not just the deep dives.
Not just the shiny business plans.

No - the vacations went in first.

A week in May.
Two weeks in August.
Three glorious weeks at Christmas.
Plus a few strategically placed “please don’t contact me, I’m living my life” long weekends.

And honestly?
This all started because I had a networking conversation back in July with another entrepreneur who casually mentioned she’d be offline for 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸𝘀 in August.
My jaw basically hit the floor.
I was SO jealous.
And I remember thinking: 𝘖𝘩. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥? 𝘞𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵?

So this is my attempt to emulate her - and take my own advice.
Because here’s the thing about being a solopreneur:
if we don’t plan rest 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, the year fills itself - and not in ways we actually want.

I ask clients all the time:
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲? 
And then:
𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗽𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁?

So consider this your friendly nudge:
Before the year ends, open that 2026 calendar.
Put the time off in first.
Treat it like a contract you’re signing with future-you.

And if you’re wondering whether I actually follow my own advice:
𝗬𝗲𝘀. 𝗜’𝗺 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗲𝘁 𝗼𝗻 𝗗𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭𝟱𝘁𝗵.
If you need me after that, I’ll be wrapping presents, drinking something warm, and minding my business.

If I were job searching right now?
I’d be networking.

Not relying on job boards.
Not waiting for January.

Just reconnecting with people I already know.

The holidays make it easy:
“Hey, hope the year’s wrapping up well for you. How’s everything going on your side? Would love to catch up if you have time.”

Light, human, zero pressure.

And based on 𝗺𝘆 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟱 𝗰𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗮, most people landed their next role because someone thought of them at the right moment - a warm intro, a quick recommendation, a “you two should talk.”

𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗮𝘄𝗮𝘆:
Pick 5 people you haven’t spoken to in a while and send them a simple holiday check-in.
Not to ask for anything - just to stay on their radar.

Because behind the scenes, hiring managers are already thinking about Q1 needs.
They’re building their bench now.

And if you want to show up in those conversations, this is the easiest way to do it.

“I’m not sure if I want this job.”

When I hear that from someone halfway through a process, it’s a flag.

Not because the job is necessarily wrong - but because somewhere along the way, they stopped getting (or asking) for the information they need to decide if it’s right for them.

I see this all the time: people focused so hard on showing up like they want the role that they forget they’re supposed to be evaluating it too.

The questions that 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 get asked are usually the ones that matter most:
> How are decisions made here?
> What does success actually look like in this role?
> How do they communicate and handle conflict?
> Does this team actually value what I bring to the table?
> Can I (realistically) see myself being successful here?

It’s easy to tell ourselves, “I can make it work.”
But if what you’re trying to make work is a culture grinds against how you operate - that's not sustainable.

No job is without flags. 
The key is deciding whether they’re about nice-to-haves... or about the core things you need to actually be successful.

Because the goal isn’t just to land the job - it’s to land somewhere you can thrive.

#interviewing #jobsearchstrategy #bestcareeradvice

One pattern I see over and over again in coaching senior candidates:
They’re great conversationalists.
They build rapport instantly.
They connect, they put people at ease, they’re fun to talk to.
And all of that can help...
until they hit the interviewer who doesn’t care.

Every interview loop has at least one person who doesn't care about vibe. 
Who doesn't just “get it.”
Who needs you to lay out the exact impact you've delivered. 

And that’s where strong conversationalists often get blindsided.

Because when you lean too heavily on rapport, you tend to:
- describe situations instead of your impact
- stay high-level instead of giving data
- agree instead of probing
- talk about what happened around you instead of what you delivered
- match the interviewer’s energy instead of showing depth

The “friendly” interviews go great.
Then the more analytical interviewer shows up and walks away thinking:
“I like them. But I didn’t hear enough to be confident they can do this job.”

And suddenly the candidate is out - not because they lacked experience,
but because they relied on likability instead of evidence.

𝗥𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗮 𝗯𝗼𝗻𝘂𝘀. 𝗖𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁.

Don’t let comfort pull you into conversation mode.
Don’t assume friendliness means you’re nailing it.

Land the fundamentals:
✅ Clear ownership
✅ Measurable outcomes
✅ Demonstrated influence and decision-making

You can be warm and show the data behind your success.

We’re six weeks out from 2026.

If you’re planning a job search or pivot in Q1, here’s the reality: the market has been draining. A lot of people are tired, discouraged, and not operating at their best.

So the next six weeks aren’t about pushing harder.

They’re about removing friction so you don’t start January feeling like you're already behind.

Here’s what I’m recommending to job seekers in my community:
𝟭. 𝗣𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝗯𝗶𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿
The one thing that helps you feel like a functional human while you’re navigating the noise.

That could be: a consistent shutdown time, one non-negotiable break each week, or putting limits on scrolling job boards at 11pm.

The point is to avoid starting Q1 already burnt out.

𝟮. 𝗖𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗮 𝗳𝗲𝘄 𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗻 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗽𝘀
These are usually small, but they take up disproportionate space in your head:

- The conversation you’ve been meaning to follow up on
- One application loose end
- A half-started update to your resume

You don’t need to take on everything — just tidy what’s distracting.

𝟯. 𝗖𝗮𝗽𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘄𝗶𝗻𝘀 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟱
Future-you will thank you.

Interview prep is 10x easier when your examples aren’t buried somewhere in your memory from April.


𝘖𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘱:
𝟰. 𝗥𝗲𝗳𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗟𝗶𝗻𝗸𝗲𝗱𝗜𝗻
A clean, current profile does a lot of quiet work for you once the search starts.

If you want some help here, join my workshop on crafting a Recruiter-Magnet profile, 3 December at 10:30a PT/1830 GMT https://lnkd.in/eesUgS2F 

𝟱. 𝗗𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝗷𝗼𝗯 𝘀𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝘂𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝗤𝟭
If you feel like your job search has been a bit all over the place and you're not seeing the traction you'd like. It's worth stepping back and considering how you could make it more targeted and intentional. 
 
If you want support with this, I've got 2 spots left in my next cohort. We kick off January 15 with a 6-week coach-led sprint to define a clear personal brand, sharpen your positioning, and build a targeted search plan you can execute with confidence. Details here: https://lnkd.in/eycPacB8

So, over to you: what would make January feel workable, not overwhelming?

AI is incredible for career change... until it isn’t.

AI is unbeatable for the tactical side of job searching:
- Brainstorming roles.
- Researching companies.
- Updating your resume to match a JD. 
- Cutting down the time from idea → action.

But here’s where it hits a wall:
AI can’t help you see yourself clearly.
It can’t connect the threads of your experience.
It can’t ask the uncomfortable questions that reveal what you actually want next.

It can’t help you answer:
> What’s the right next step for me?
> How do my strengths and values shape that move?
> Who do I want to be in my next role?

You’d need a million prompts to get close - and even then, you might miss the real issue.

AI accelerates the process.
Coaching helps you choose the right direction in the first place.

What role are you giving it in your search?

I had to break some hearts on the call yesterday.

In my Recruiter-Magnet workshop, I reviewed a bunch of profiles — smart people, experienced people, people who should be getting tapped on the shoulder...
...and most of them were falling into one of two buckets:

→ Overwritten and generic
(paragraphs of text that could describe basically anyone)

→ Underwritten and empty
(no real information, no story, no direction)

And here’s the part that stings a bit:
Both problems make you invisible.

A long profile full of generic language?
Recruiters can’t see what makes you the right hire.

A sparse profile with no detail?
Recruiters can’t see your value.

It’s the same outcome.

The fix isn’t “write more” or “write less.”
It’s write with clarity.

A strong LinkedIn profile does three things quickly:
1️⃣ Shows who you are
2️⃣ Shows the value you create
3️⃣ Shows where you’re going next

If your profile doesn’t do those three things, recruiters don’t know how to place you.
And when they can’t place you, they don’t reach out.

The good news?
Once you do get those three pieces right… people finally see what you bring to the table.

That’s the whole point of being a recruiter magnet.

P.S. Knowing what you need to do is different than knowing how to do it. If you'd like to take your job search to the next level, there's still room in my January coaching cohort. 
Details here: https://lnkd.in/eycPacB8

Every job opening is a problem that recruiters are trying to solve - fast.

Most people show up to recruiters like they’re there to be judged.

But here’s the truth:
🧩 Every open rec = a problem a recruiter is desperate to solve.
When you land in their inbox (or their LinkedIn search), the best thing you can do is say:
“That thing you’re trying to fix? I solve that. Let me show you how.”

This works so much better than vague intros, fluffy headlines, or “open to work” vibes.

So before you hit send on that message or connection request, ask yourself:

✨ Am I clearly showing how I solve a real business problem?
✨ Would they instantly see why I’m relevant?

Recruiters aren’t gatekeepers.
They’re matchmakers under pressure.
Make it easy for them to say: “𝙊𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙜𝙤𝙙, 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙨 𝙞𝙩.”

If you want some help sorting how to do this clearly - join my workshop Thursday. Seriously, it's a game changer for understanding how recruiters find you and how you can make sure you're visible. 

If you're looking for a job, you don't want to miss this. 
🔗 in 💬

You can’t run a job search from the belief that you have no options.

I was working with a client who kept saying they felt backed into a corner.
Burnt out.
Stuck.
Convinced they didn’t have any agency in their career.

And the more we talked, the more obvious it became that this wasn’t a one-time feeling - it was a story they’d repeated to themselves so many times it felt like fact.

But underneath it, there was something else:
A quiet recognition that they wanted more, and didn’t think they could have it.

Here’s what most people miss:
If you believe you have no power, your job search will reflect that.
- You won’t set boundaries.
- You won’t speak up for what you want.
- You’ll take the first thing offered because it feels “safe.”
...And you’ll carry the same patterns into the next job.

That’s why we didn’t start with “What role do you want next?”
We started with burnout and mindset
because you bring your brain with you wherever you go.

And once that foundation shifted, so did everything else.
- They had more clarity.
- They trusted their intuition.
- And they could finally see options they couldn’t see before.

Now, their default is:
“I get to decide what happens next.”

If you’re in this place, here’s a simple check-in I use with clients:
> Does this option feel like something I actually want, or something I can just tolerate?
> Am I shrinking my choices because I’m exhausted… or because the option isn’t a fit?
> What would I choose if I believed I wasn’t boxed in?

Even one honest answer can start shifting you out of “I don’t have a choice” and into “I actually do have room here.”

Thoughts?

A quick follow-up from yesterday’s workshop - because this is one of the most underrated growth levers on LinkedIn:

𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗸 𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗱𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝘀.

People often ask how to start creating content on LinkedIn.

And here’s the pattern I see: they put enormous pressure on themselves to write the “perfect” post, spend hours crafting it... and then it gets minimal engagement.

That experience is discouraging - and it stops most people from posting again.

This is why I *don’t* recommend content creation as your first line of defence.

If you start with commenting, two things happen immediately:
1. You get familiar with what people in your industry are actually talking about.
2. You start generating your own content ideas without forcing it. 

Commenting depressurises the whole system. You’re not staring at a blank screen trying to invent something profound. You’re entering real conversations, adding value, and learning what resonates in real time.

And it works.

My clients who comment regularly see 𝟮–𝟯𝘅 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗻𝗯𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 than they had before they became active.

Why?
Because LinkedIn rewards activity. 
The more you engage, the more LinkedIn surfaces your profile in:
- “People You May Know”
- Search results 
- Feed recommendations
- Suggested profiles

And when you comment on posts from people with bigger audiences - leaders in your space, hiring managers, industry creators - you’re showing up where the 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 already are.

If you want to make commenting work for you, here’s the simple 3-step framework I teach (and it works every time):

𝟭. 𝗔𝗰𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗹𝗲𝗱𝗴𝗲: Recognise their point/thank them for the insight.
𝟮. 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁: Point out what resonated. 
𝟯. 𝗘𝗻𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲: Add your perspective or ask a thoughtful question.

That’s it.
Low pressure. High visibility. Immediate learning.

It was one of the biggest lightbulb moments from the workshop - and I’m sharing it here because it’s the easiest way to build momentum on LinkedIn without burning hours trying to craft the perfect post.

If you want more of the right people landing on your profile, start with commenting. It’s the simplest path to traction.

Every major career jump I made at Amazon had one thing in common:
Someone in the room said, “Yeah, Mel would be great here.”

Advocates opened those doors - across internal moves, stretch opportunities, and my promotion.

Here’s what most people overlook:
𝗪𝗲’𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿-𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿-𝗮𝗱𝘃𝗼𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿.
Plenty of people will give you advice. 
Far fewer will speak positively about you in the rooms that decide promotions, opportunities, and scope.

And in a place like Amazon, that gap is costly.
360 reviews. Broad stakeholder feedback. Promo docs reviewed by senior leaders you may never have worked with.
Your reputation is often interpreted by people who don’t actually know you.

The rub is that you likely can’t convert 36 stakeholders (and their manager's manager) into advocates.

But you 𝙘𝙖𝙣 curate how people experience you:
* Be clear and consistent about your personal brand.
* Deliver in a way that makes your strengths visible.
* Partner well with adjacent teams.
* Solve problems in ways that make it easy for someone to say, “She sorted that for us.”

And convert mentors to advocates by giving them visibility into what you're great at and where you want to go. 

That's the game-changer. 

So here’s the question to ask yourself today:
- Who are your advocates? 
- Could you 'convert' a mentor to an advocate? 

If you’re not sure, it’s time for a check-in. 

(Watch 👇)

✨ Mel’s holiday survival tips: answering the job search question ✨
(AKA: Surviving the moment your father-in-law tilts his head and asks, “So... any news?”)

As we head into Thanksgiving week, I’ve been talking with clients about that moment - you know the one - 
where a well-meaning relative asks about your job search and suddenly you feel like you’ve been pulled into an unexpected performance review.

And look, I get it.

Even in my world, people say things to me like,
“𝘞𝘰𝘸, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸.”
Delivered with a kind of solemn, pitying head tilt.
So yeah, I get the vibe.

And that’s exactly why I tell clients:
Don’t wait until the question hits you to figure out what to say.

Having a talk track ready is the difference between a 10-second answer and a spiral.
Here’s what actually helps:
🛡 1. Your baseline answer for people who can’t help (which is most of the room).
These relatives want to check in, but they’re not hiring you and they’re not the target audience for your pipeline data.

Keep it simple, neutral, and done:
- “It’s moving. I’m focusing on what I can control.”
- “It’s going the way these things usually go - steady.”
- “I’m having conversations and keeping it in motion.”

If they push (because someone always pushes):
- “I appreciate you asking - I promise I’m on it.”
- “I’ll share updates when there’s real news.”
- “Yeah, it’s a process, but I’ve got a plan. How’s your year been?”

Short. Respectful. Closed-loop.

🎯 2. The plan for the 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 who might actually be helpful.
If there's someone who works somewhere interesting, this is where preparation actually matters. I regularly forget where my extended family is working these days - assuming you're in the same boat, here's your nudge to go look up where your cousin is working these days. 

Before you walk in:
- Know the company/team you’re curious about.
- Know why you might fit.
- Open the conversation through curiosity - not desperation.

Try something like:
“I saw ___ about your company - sounds really interesting. Based on my background in ___, I think that area could be a fit. What’s your read on it?”

Let them talk.

If they’re receptive:
“Would you be open to connecting me with someone on that team so I can learn more?”

And make a clean follow-up plan for after the holiday dust settles.

Ultimately, you don't really owe anyone an explanation, but under pressure it can feel like you do. 
Being a little bit prepared is how you protect your energy. 

If you’ve got a line that’s helped you dodge the awkward holiday interrogation, drop it below - I'm sure someone will need it this week.

Is your inbox full of irrelevant roles? or worse - nothing 🦗 ? 
Then it's likely your LinkedIn profile is the problem
Join my workshop tomorrow to fix it 

We'll be diving into the 6 must-Dos to make your profile a recruiter-magnet.

120 people have already registered, so if you want to join us, now’s the time to grab your seat.

We’re going to focus on the practical, high-impact changes that immediately sharpen your positioning, including how to:
- Make it clear what you actually do - in the first five seconds
- Strengthen the sections recruiters read first
- Highlight accomplishments without sounding vague or inflated
- Avoid the quiet profile mistakes that push you out of consideration

If you’re planning to network or apply for roles before year-end, this is the easiest way to get your profile working for you so you can move faster.

Nab your spot now. Let's get your profile in shape 💪

https://lnkd.in/eesUgS2F

Wednesday I'm rocking out with 100 people 
teaching them how to make their LinkedIn a Recruiter-Magnet

If you haven't gotten in on this
this is your sign - 
now's the time to make your profile work for you. 

Direct link to register: https://lnkd.in/eesUgS2F

Want to be found on LinkedIn? 
Then this is the masterclass for you.

Don't take my word for it, here's what a recent attendee had to say: 

"So much useful information was given in the hour session - every insight was invaluable! From headlines to resume visibility...and so much more, I'm looking forward to making some positive changes!"

December 3 at 10:30a PT/ 1:30p ET/ 6:30p GMT

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The Battle

Adam Smith

Mel Fox Dhar

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Performance ScoreAdam Smith's LinkedIn Performance

Performance ScoreMel Fox Dhar's LinkedIn Performance

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taplio

The Battle

Adam Smith

Mel Fox Dhar

Followers

Posts

Engagements

Likes

Performance Score.css-goub6s{font-size:var(--chakra-fontSizes-md);font-weight:500;color:var(--chakra-colors-gray-600);display:block;margin-top:var(--chakra-space-1);}Adam Smith's LinkedIn Performance

Performance ScoreMel Fox Dhar's LinkedIn Performance

Ready to grow your LinkedIn presence?

Performance ScoreAdam Smith's LinkedIn Performance